03102010: Smile, and Pretend

Last night I accompany a best friend of mine to his batch's dinner, which supposedly attended by my other friend who cancelled at 11th hour. So, I ended up awkward at the table. Oh well, as long as the food are okey, so I'm good. There I met an old friend, and made a new one. Yeay me.

Super Junior?

Nom nom nom

Speaking about awkward.

I think that is the situation I am feeling now. Can I go back to where I was? I have this tendency to freak myself out, and is easily traumatized.

Life. Am I living my dream now? No.

I've been living in this little box. I pretend that I am happy. I try to tell myself, hey, you are lucky to have what you got now. I tried, tried, and tried. But looks like it doesn't bring much help.

So. Now I'm drawing my next game plan. Try to fit in every possibility, every opportunity that I might have missed, and try to push through. I will survive. I must survive.


Money Matters

Wow, we should do this here in Malaysia.

070910: Because I'm Leaving

Currently in LCCT waiting for my flight home. And wondering where all the pretty people go. I've been here for 2 hours but never see one living person who I can consider an eye candy. Sigh.

Where have all the pretty ones gone?

I'm letting my baby Chuck being used by my cousin for a week. Although I must admit it is hard to let him go, but I guess I have to put all my trust on them. Sigh. Hopefully no scratch/dent (God forbid) on my little baby. In return, I get their Honda CRV. Maybe not. The text my cousin sent me clearly says "Atas risiko sendiri" and it does make me nervous.

Another hour before my flight.

I'll wait at least until 9 before I go inside departure hall.

I'm planning to dye my hair.

Any taker?

Don't have any more ideas.


210810: Stomp baby, Stomp

Oh, I am still not satisfied with this theme.

And so the search continues.

Just now before sahur, I had a bit of nightmare-ish. I was killed by a cyborg-gone-rogue, headshot. Haha. And on my mind when I was hit was, gosh I haven't named my beneficiary for my insurance! Hahahaha.

Lately I experienced quite a few funky dreams.

Oh well.


210810: Night Craze


It's really been a long long time ago since I even visited my own blog. Haha. I also don't know whether its because I don't have time for it (geez) or just damn lazy to maintain it.

Oh well.

I want to make a little makeover. The theme I have now is kinda lame a bit. So maybe I'll spend my night and surf for interesting and more "me" theme.

(I suddenly remembered this blog entitled ilovemyself####.blogspot.com gosh beyond narcissist)

Enough talk bad about other people.

Anyways. Just a quick update about myself.

A month ago, I bought a car. Black Myvi SE. I'm so loving it. And I name it Chuck (although I prefer to name it Nate) *awhhhhhh starry eyes*

But after approximately 8 days, my company where I worked sent me to Sabah for site visit. Haha. It was kinda funny since I was so rushing to buy that car since "someone" said he will send his car to his brother when he's out of town when I ask him whether I can borrow his car. Turned out, he just left the car here. Sigh. Oh well. Nevermind that. At least now I don't have to ask practically anyone in office to take ride home. I'm in control of my own destiny again. Yeah.

My love life (do I have one? Dunno) is a bit roller coaster ride. But a man gotta do, what a man gotta do. Life goes on.

And urgh today in office, there's this little guy who just smacked my head out of nowhere. And as return, I pinch his tit as hard as I could. Haha. Don't mess with me. I'm gonna twist your tits till you beg for your momma.

Haha. Too much? Neh. Told you guys, this blog is filled with craps.

Ok, time to think about renovation for this blog.


Trust Issue

Walk the talk lah.


110710: Despite All These

I still don't have the guts to rip off the band-aid.

I guess I blame it on my inability to change my destiny.

And as cheesy and corny as Eclipse (You know, the Twilight thingy. Yea, I watched it. Against all odds), I find it quite enlightening. In part that everything in life starts with a decision.

I made many decisions in my life (geez what a cliche). Some are stupid, some regrettable. But there are also the decisions that helped me to be where I am now. And I think my lack of go-jump-and-experience-it attitude makes me, somehow in some way, less wise than others. I was so afraid of making mistakes, that I am overly cautious in deciding anything.

I do strongly believe that by making mistakes in fact helps us to become a better person.

But I guess the way I was brought up makes me so afraid of taking the wrong steps. I need to learn on how to overcome that.

Ah aku merepek lagi.